The rest of the week went by smoothly and on Friday Kevin took the bus and returned home. Frankie volunteered to pick him up, to save me from making the trip, and I gratefully accepted his offer. I had agreed to let Kevin come home one additional weekend, so he could spend a little more time with Vinnie. I made this concession to give them a chance to relieve some of the stress they had both been through, due to Kevin’s unfaithfulness and Vinnie’s disappearance.
Before Kevin arrived, I had Vinnie call Duck and ask him if we could stop by on Saturday. Vinnie informed Duck I wanted to thank him and pay him back for the money he had spent while Vinnie stayed there. Duck said he had no plans and we could drop by, so Vinnie told him we’d be there a little after noon. Duck agreed that would be fine, so we made our plans accordingly.
Of course, Kevin wanted to come with us, but Vinnie wasn’t sure how Duck might take it. Duck had treated Vinnie really well, but Vinnie wasn’t sure he would have, if he’d known he was gay. Kevin was insistent about not being left behind, so I told them we could just say Kevin was one of Vinnie’s brothers and that should suffice. After thinking about it for a few seconds, Vinnie decided it would probably work, so it was agreed that Kevin would go too.
We all packed a small overnight bag, with a change of clothes and a few other things, just in case the visit went well and we stayed longer than just one day. I suggested if that happened, we could get a room for the night and both boys thought that would be fine. Since everything was set, we said good-bye to the others and headed out.
We got to Duck’s apartment around 1:00 and I was intrigued once I met him. He wasn’t quite what I was expecting. He was only about 5’ 8” tall, had a very slender build, brown hair with blond highlights and very attractive green eyes. Duck was actually quite cute and I was surprised Vinnie never mentioned that fact or tried to hit on the guy.
Watching Kevin’s reaction after he first met Duck, I think he might have been a little jealous of the time Vinnie and Duck spent together. Vinnie had stayed there for a couple of weeks and never really said much about what he did while he was there, which obviously left Kevin wondering. Besides, I immediately got the impression Duck might be gay and wondered if that was why he had been so helpful. However, I then remembered Vinnie telling me Duck had a girlfriend, so I figured I must be mistaken.
“Duck, this is my dad, Josh Currie and my brother Kevin. Dad and Kevin, this is Duck,” Vinnie introduced us.
“Don, call me Josh, please,” I told him.
“And you can call me Duck,” he responded. “All my friends do.”
“Well, thank you and I’m pleased that you would consider us to be friends.” At that point, we all took turns shakings hands.
“Look, I not only came here to meet you,” I announced, “but to thank you as well. It was extremely kind of you to help Vinnie out like you did. I don’t know what might have happened to him if you hadn’t, because he was pretty vulnerable at that point.”
“Yes, he was really down and kind of out of it,” Duck replied, while looking over at Vinnie. After a few seconds, he continued.
“Hey, dude, did you two get things patched up?” Vinnie blushed a bit and I think it was because he was thinking Duck was referring to his supposed rift with a female lover.
“Ah… yes… we did,” he finally stammered.
“So you and he are okay now?” Duck followed, and Vinnie’s face turned red.
“Why did you say that?” he asked, flabbergasted.
“Well, one night I came out to get a drink while you were sleeping on the couch and you said something like ‘Kevin, why did you do that to me?’ So, I just figured that was whom you’d had the fight with. Now, after meeting Kevin here, it all kind of fell into place.” Duck didn’t seem to be troubled by the fact, so I was wondering if maybe my first impression about him had been correct after all.
“Vinnie, don’t worry,” Duck added, “I probably could consider myself bi, because I’ve messed around with guys a couple of times too, but I’m very happy with my girlfriend now, that’s all.”
I think Vinnie breathed a sigh of relief after Duck told him this, although it might have added to Kevin’s tinge of jealousy. I think he realized Vinnie and Duck never did anything, but the revelation still unsettled him a bit.
“That’s cool,” Vinnie countered, “and thanks for being so understanding.” The two actually hugged afterward.
“I guess you already realize that Kevin is more than just my brother,” Vinnie continued. “He and I have been boyfriends for a while, but there was a little problem…”
“Yeah, I guessed that,” Duck said, playfully.
“And thank you for taking care of him for me,” Kevin told Duck. “I felt bad enough that I hurt him, but I don’t know if I could have lived with myself if anything bad had happened to him.”
“No, problem, dude,” Duck replied. “I just understood what Vinnie was going through.”
“Duck,” I interrupted. “Another reason I insisted we come here was so I could reimburse you the money you spent on Vinnie and reward you for helping us find him. I think you noticed our missing posters had a reward amount listed on them.”
“I did, but I don’t want any reward money,” he quickly countered.
“But I insist,” I informed him, while reaching into my pocket and withdrawing the cash. I then handed him fifteen $100 bills. Ducks eyes popped out of his head as I spread them apart, so he could see how many there were.
“Whoa, I can’t accept all of this,” Duck said after counting them.
“You can and you will,” I insisted, while pushing the money into his hand.
“But the reward only said $1,000, and I already thought that was way too much,” he admitted. Duck looked uncomfortable about keeping what I just gave him.
“Yes, the reward was $1,000, but the other $500 is for the money you spent on Vinnie for food and such, and then a little extra to pay for his room, so to speak.”
“I can’t take this much,” he insisted again, but I wouldn’t hear otherwise.
“You will and we’re taking you out to dinner tonight too,” I added. “So, I hope you don’t have any plans.”
“I don’t,” he stated, “but you’ve already done way too much.”
“And so did you,” I challenged, “but that didn’t stop you either. So, seeing none of us knows this area very well, we want you to help us choose the restaurant. The finest you have around here, so don’t try to fool me with something less. Let’s look up the number, so I can make a reservation, and I don’t want to hear any objections to the contrary.”
Now that Duck realized I wasn’t one to be argued with, once I’d made up my mind, he just sighed and did as I asked. However, we still had some time to kill, before any of us were ready to eat.
Sitting around and talking some more, we got to know each other better. When it got closer to our reservation time, we started cleaning up and getting changed for dinner. Vinnie and Kevin went down to get our bags, so we could put on something more appropriate. Once we were dressed and ready to go, we went out and got into the van. The boys let Duck take the front passenger seat, while they crawled into the back.
Another reason they had allowed Duck to take the front seat, besides being polite, was so he could give me directions to the restaurant. Even though Vinnie had stayed here for a while, he didn’t get out much, so he was just as unsure about how to get around as Kevin and I were. Since none of us knew our way, we needed Duck to serve as my navigator. It didn’t take long for us to get to where he directed us, so I parked the van and we headed for the front door.
The exterior of the restaurant was quite lovely and done in an interesting and unique style, so I instinctively felt Duck had made a very fine selection. After entering, we announced our arrival and were ushered directly to our table. Looking around and checking out the furnishings and clientele, it was obvious this was indeed one of the finer establishments in the area. Once we were shown to our table, we took our places, with Duck sitting between Vinnie and I, while Kevin sat directly across from him. This meant Kevin was sitting between Vinnie and I as well
We had barely gotten comfortable in our chairs before the cocktail waitress arrived to take our drink orders. Duck and I ordered a mixed drink, while Kevin and Vinnie requested sodas, and then I ordered a bottle of wine to go with the meal. Of course, Duck was asked for I.D., since he looked so young, which he quickly produced. The waitress nodded and went off to fill our order.
I told the boys not to worry about prices and order whatever they wanted, but Duck still looked a little uncomfortable about doing it. After convincing him I was serious, it didn’t take us long to decide what we wanted. While we waited for our drinks to arrive and our orders to be taken, I began a conversation with Duck.
“Duck, it was a really nice thing you did for Vinnie, but you were taking an awfully big chance by allowing a total stranger to stay with you,” I informed him. “There is no way you could have been sure what he was really like, at least not until you’d gotten to know him. He could have ended up robbing you blind while you were at work or even done something worse, yet you didn’t let that stop you. Why did you take such a big risk?”
Duck looked at me, and then at both boys, before swallowing hard and responding. “I did it because someone once helped me in a similar situation,” he admitted, but I could tell this discussion was making him more than a little uncomfortable. I decided it might be best if I ended his discomfort quickly.
“Hey, I can see this isn’t easy for you to talk about, so you don’t need to say any more,” I suggested. Duck gave me a look, as if he was studying me, and then he looked at Kevin and Vinnie as well, to observe their expressions. He must have thought we all looked sincere and non-judgmental, or possibly he just felt comfortable with us, but either way, he disregarded my offer and continued with his story.
“It’s not that, exactly,” he informed us. “It’s just that only a couple of people know about this and I didn’t think I’d ever tell anyone else what happened back then.” I could see this was going to take a lot out of him just to share this information and I didn’t want to spoil his dinner or make him miserable.
“Duck, it’s okay. You don’t need to tell us,” I said soothingly, while noticing both boys were sitting bug-eyed and staring at him. I think he was ready to begin at the moment, but he got another reprieve. The cocktail waitress returned with our drinks just then, so we all stopped and took a sip. Once she left, Duck looked at us and spoke.
“Okay, I guess it’s time for me to do this now,” he stated and then swallowed hard.
“Duck, you really don’t have to,” I informed him again.
“No, I want to,” he replied, quickly. “I’ve kept it inside me for way too long and think it will be good to finally get it out in the open. I’m tired of keeping this hidden.
“Are you sure?” I asked. “You really don’t have to do this for our benefit.”
“No, you guys are probably the only ones who might understand and not judge me harshly because of it,” he stated. Duck was looking down at the table when he said this, but then he lifted his head and looked directly at me.
When he did, I could read the sadness in his eyes, but also got the impression he was hoping to shed the years of pain and anguish he had suffered from keeping this secret. However, I knew this could drain him emotionally when he did so. In an effort to make it a little easier for him, I reached over and placed my hand over his, as it rested on the table. My gesture caused him to give me a weak grin.
“You see,” he began, feeling a little more confident now, “my dad and I never really got along. He was a very controlling person and saw himself as king of his castle. He could be very abusive, mostly mentally and emotionally, but there were times when he could also be physically abusive.
“Most of the time he would just scream at my mother, sister and me, as he repeatedly told us how dumb we were. He also claimed we couldn’t do anything without him and were parasites that were sucking him dry. We all lived in constant fear of pissing him off and then having him unleash one of his verbal or physical attacks against us. Even though we did our best to avoid that, it seemed to happen all the time, but it came to a head when I was fifteen.”
Duck began to tighten up now and his voice started to choke off the words in his throat, so he stopped momentarily. It was a good thing he did, because our waiter showed up to take our orders at that moment, so we all stopped and informed him what we wanted. Once he left, I patted Duck’s hand, to let him know he was doing fine, and he gave me another weak smile, before continuing his story. He also lowered his voice, when he did so.
“Remember when I told you I’d messed around with some guys before?” he asked, and we all nodded. “Well, it was really only one, when I was a freshman in high school. You see, I was really interested in this one guy. He was really cute and in most of my classes, so I saw him all the time. I really had it bad for him and one day I finally got up the nerve to invite him over to my house, just to play some video games and things like that. I thought by doing this I might also be able to find out if he was interested in me.
“I only had the guts to do it because I knew my dad never got home until at least 6:00 or later and my mom was going to be gone too. She was going to watch my sister’s softball game out of town, so I figured this would be the perfect opportunity. I cornered him that morning, while we were leaving one of the classes we had together.
“When I asked him, he seemed interested, but said he’d have to call home and check first. He said he’d do it at lunchtime, which meant I was holding my breath the rest of the morning and praying he could get permission to join me. When lunch period finally began, he went to use the phone before he even ate, and when he finished his call, he came back to tell me it was cool and he could come over. Needless to say, I was so excited by this news that I was kind of out of it for the rest of the day. I did manage to tell him I’d meet him out in front of the school after our last class and then we went our separate ways.”
Duck paused in telling his story, so he could wet his lips with another sip of his drink. He then swallowed a few extra times, in an effort to get the lump in his throat to go down. Eventually, he felt comfortable enough to continue.
“Well, we went to my place and started playing video games. We were having a really great time and things were going really well, when I told him I was hoping we could become really good friends. He said he’d like that too and then put his arm around my shoulder and gave me kind of a half hug. I don’t know why I did it, but as he squeezed my shoulder and pulled me toward him, I leaned into him and kissed him on the cheek.
When I did, he stopped hugging me and just sat there for a second. He didn’t say anything, so I got really scared. I was about to get up and run from the room, because I figured he was going to attack me or start calling me names or something, but he didn’t. Instead, he leaned into me and kissed me on the lips.
It wasn’t an open mouth kiss or anything like that, just a sweet little kiss, like you might give your mother, and then he stopped and looked to see how I was reacting. We just sat like that for the longest time and did nothing else.”
I could tell by the change of expression on Duck’s face that remembering the moment was giving him a really good feeling. At this point of the story, we were interrupted when our waiter returned with our appetizers. Once he had placed everything on the table and gone off again, Duck resumed his tale.
“Well, after that kiss, we both started telling each other how we felt and talked about many different things. Then we began to think we might like to try doing something, but we weren’t sure what. We were both new at this, but eventually decided we’d get undressed and then masturbate each other.
“We quickly stripped off all our clothes and were standing there, looking at each other’s bodies, admiring how beautiful they were. We were just about to reach out and touch the other’s penis, when the door to my room opened and my dad started saying he needed my help with something.
“I don’t know why he came home early that day, but when he saw us both standing there naked, he just went crazy. He began screaming and swearing at us, while we were rushing to put our clothes back on. As I bent over to grab my stuff, my dad backhanded me and knocked me on my butt. Then he began throwing things around the room and breaking all kinds of crap in the process.
“The other boy had put some of his clothes on and then just reached out and grabbed the rest, so he could run past my father and escape. As the boy raced from my room, my dad was so mad that he grabbed the side of my bed and flipped it over. I was totally frightened, so I rounded up the rest of my clothes and bolted from the room too. I don’t know what he threw at me when I went out the door, but it was hard and hit me right in the back. It hurt like hell. Then, I heard him call me names, before he screamed I was never to come back there again. He highlighted that point by yelling I was a total disgrace and no longer his son.”
Duck was choking up again and I could see the moisture building in his eyes. There was not enough water to form tears yet, but enough to create a film over his corneas. My heart was aching for him, as I imagined the enormous amount of pain he endured, both then and now, but there was nothing any of us could do for him. Finally, he realized we were waiting, so he went back to telling his story.
“Once I was outside, I caught up to my friend and apologized for what had happened, but he wasn’t in the forgiving mood just then. I told him I was running away, because I couldn’t take any more abuse from my old man, and that’s when he began to soften a little. He told me I could stay with him for the night, if I wanted, so I took him up on his offer. My father didn’t know who he was or where he lived, so I felt it would be safe for me to go there.
“When we got to his place, he asked his mother if I could stay for dinner and then spend the night, and she agreed, but not eagerly. Seeing it was a school night, she was a little skeptical about me staying there, but I told her my mom and dad went out of town to attend something with my sister and they wouldn’t be back until really late.
“I said I’d left them a note to let them know I might be staying at a friend’s house, so they wouldn’t worry. I also told her if she didn’t want me to stay, I would go back home, throw the note away and just stay alone until they returned. However, his mother didn’t seem to like that idea either, so she finally gave in and I got to spend the night.”
“Well, after everyone else went to sleep later, we talked about what had happened earlier. My friend told me how badly it had shaken him up and said he didn’t think his parents would have reacted anywhere near that violently. He figured they might have sat him down to ‘talk’ about it, but doubted they would have done much more than that.
“Encouraged by his response, and still wanting to do something with him, I finally asked if he wanted to try it now. I could tell by looking at him that he wasn’t too sure about it at first, but eventually he gave in. After all that, we finally got a chance to jack each other off.
“It was really great and we both enjoyed it, but later I realized it was mostly just experimentation for each of us. I hadn’t yet determined I was bi, but I did know I wanted to date girls too. The other boy might have thought he was bi when we started, but I think my father scared him into just being straight from then on. I don’t think he ever did anything with another boy after that night.
“I went back to see him again, a few years later, after I turned eighteen. I just wanted to thank him for being so kind to me and apologize again for what my father had done. That’s when I found out he had a steady girlfriend and didn’t even want to talk about what we’d done, but maybe I should just get back to the point of my story.
“Anyway, I knew I couldn’t stay at his house for more than just that one night, so the next morning, after we got ready for school, we went our separate way. I told him I had to run home first to pick up my schoolbooks and he believed me, so I went off on my own. It wasn’t really what I was going to do, but I didn’t know what else to tell him. Instead, I just wandered around the streets for a while, until I felt certain no one would be at my place. Then, I went back to get my clothes and stuff, because I knew I had to run away. I had no other choice, but I needed to get as many of my things as I could first.
“I was able to slip into the house and get what I needed without being discovered, but what I found wasn’t pretty. My dad had totally trashed my room, so it was difficult to find what I was looking for. That’s when it began to really sink in that I was now homeless, but it still didn’t make any sense.
“Sure, that boy and I had planned to mess around a bit, but as it turned out, I wasn’t gay, as my father suspected. Even though I was bi, I was still more attracted to girls, yet he went crazy and thought the worst of me. My relationship with my father ended that day over nothing, but there isn’t anything I can do about it now.”
Duck had a sad, yet thoughtful expression on his face, and I wondered if maybe he was contemplating trying to get back in touch with his family. I wouldn’t try to influence such a personal decision on his part, but I was actually hoping he might consider it. Who knows, maybe his father has mellowed or now realizes his mistake and how much he lost by his outburst. However, my thoughts were interrupted when Duck began to speak again.