While the boys were still in with Andrew, I took Jake for a walk, to give us some time alone. We told the boys what we were going to do before we left and they didn’t have a problem with it. As Jake and I strolled down the halls, I began to unburden myself to him.
“I was so scared I was going to lose him,” I began.
“I could tell,” Jake responded, simply.
“Jake, I’m not sure I could have handled it if something terrible had happened to Andrew,” I continued. “I’m not sure I can continue doing this any longer.” Jake looked shocked.
“What are saying? Are you planning on kicking them all out?” he asked, rhetorically. “Or will you just keep them locked up in the house from now on?” I knew he was being facetious and trying to get me to see the absurdity of my position.
“Jake, I understand I can’t do that and I wouldn’t want to anyways,” I explained, “but I also know I couldn’t have handled it, had things not turned out as they have.”
“Josh, I also know you couldn’t live if you didn’t have these boys in your life,” he reasoned. “When you love someone, you also take some risks. I think we both are wise enough to know that. I lost my wife through divorce and you lost yours through death, and we’ve also lost a couple of boys too. The thing is, if you knew that when you first met them, would you have refused to take them in?”
“No, I wouldn’t have sent them away,” I admitted, “but it doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt to lose them.”
“I know that,” Jake confided, “but Brent and Cody both benefited from the time they were with you and you also gained a great deal from them as well, didn’t you?”
“Yes, I did,” I told him, as I thought back upon the wonderful times I’d had with both Brent and Cody.
“Then just remember those moments,” Jake continued. “Over the years you’ve taken many chances and there were a great many positives that came from these choices, but only a few bad things have happened. Yes, they were severe, but I don’t think they outweigh all the positives that have come out of what you’ve done. Overall, you’ve done so much good by taking care of these boys, even though the losses sometimes seem to overshadow those other accomplishments. Do you think Trey would have written and produced his play if he didn’t live here and have your encouragement and support? Would Dion have shone vocally and now be taking vocal lessons, if he lived in a foster home. Would Andrew have developed his artistic talent, without your guidance and motivational support? Would Pat have received the care after his injury or Frankie come back to turn his life around under someone else’s tutelage. Would Ricky or Nick have wanted to become exchange students and made the most of that experience or Peter have come to stay with us without your help and leadership. I could go on and on, but I think you get the point.” Jake paused briefly, before continuing.
“I’ll agree, we dodged a bullet today, but it won’t prevent something else from happening in the future. We have to take each day as it comes, accept the good with the bad and continue to look toward the future – and not dwell on past setbacks. You’ve done a great deal of good by taking these boys in and I’m sure none of them regret what you did.
“Even though they’ve also been affected and suffered from those losses,” Jake continued, “I’m positive none of them would have stayed away, even knowing what awaited them in advance. We’ll all survive and be better for it, no matter what else happens. Come on, let’s go back and enjoy this moment for what it is and not for what it might have been.”
After a few more seconds of reflecting on his advice, I realized the wisdom in his words and accepted the fact that I might have been overreacting. To show Jake how much he meant to me, I threw my arms around his chest and gave him a tremendous hug, which caught him completely off guard. After a few seconds of hesitation, he hugged me back, and then we broke our embrace and walked back into Andrew’s room. However, as we did, I made sure to thank him again and tell him how much he meant to me.
A little while later, Jake suggested it was time for him to leave and said he’d take Sammy and Little Ricky home with him. Sammy looked a little panicked, although I wasn’t sure of the reason, but that ended when he asked if he could speak with me alone before they left. I told him we could go down to the waiting area, if he wanted to, and he said he thought that would do just fine.
Once we were alone, Sammy used the opportunity to thank me again for helping him out of his situation and apologized for not coming to me sooner. I told him I understood his reasons for not wanting to confide in me, but then went on to explain that I wouldn’t have gotten involved in the situation, if he had told me that’s what he wanted. I may have tried to convince him otherwise, but if I saw he was still positive it would be best, after hearing me out, I would have honored his wishes. The only exception would have been if I felt his safety was in jeopardy.
I also reiterated that he should always at least talk things over with me, to see if I had any ideas he might find acceptable, even if he didn’t want me to take direct action. He said he would do so from now on, so I gave him a hug and was ready to send him on his way. However, I soon discovered there was even more he wanted to discuss with me.
“Dad, I want to thank you for helping Andrew too,” he continued, “but there’s something else.” I was a little confused.
“Oh, and what would that be?” I asked. Nervously, Sammy began to look around, as if he didn’t know how to continue, so I gave him some time to work it out on his own. After a fairly lengthy pause, he continued.
“Richard told me what he did and said he’d told you too,” Sammy explained, since the boys call him Rickard, not Little Ricky. “I don’t know what to do now. I wanted to beat the crap out of him, because of what he did to Andrew, but I also know he didn’t mean to hurt him. What do you think I should do?”
“I think you should forgive him and then forget about it,” I suggested. “It was an accident and a mistake any one of us could have made. It was the same way with many of Andrew’s practical jokes. Some of them could have turned out just as badly, but I don’t think we’d have beaten him up if they did. I think we would have understood he didn’t mean it and then forgiven him. Hopefully, we’ll all learn from it and nothing like this will happen again, in the future.”
“But won’t I be letting Andrew down, if I don’t get even for him?” Sammy wondered.
“No, not at all,” I answered, “and I think Andrew would tell you the same thing. In fact, if you want to check with him when we go back, you can.”
“But he doesn’t know about what Richard did, does he?” Sammy asked, concerned.
“I think he might,” I confirmed. “Richard told Andrew about it that night he spent time with Andrew alone. Even though Andrew wasn’t conscious at the time, I think it might still have registered in his brain. If not, he has the right to know what happened, and I’m sure Richard will apologize to him again, now that he’s awake.”
“You really think I should just let it go then?” Sammy wondered, because he still wasn’t certain he knew what to do.
“Yes, I do,” I confirmed. “I know it takes a big man to walk away without getting even, but I think you’re big enough to do that. Is there anything else?” I pushed, hoping this was now settled.
“No, I guess not,” he told me. “Thanks, Dad.”
“You’re welcome,” I replied, before I gave him another hug.
We walked back to Andrew’s room and I made sure Sammy got to spend a few minutes alone with his brother, before Jake took him and Little Ricky home. A few minutes later, when I went in to check on how they were doing, Sammy spoke.
“You were right, Dad,” he announced. “Andrew told me not to do anything to Richard. Andrew said it was mostly his fault, because it wouldn’t have happened if he hadn’t played all those jokes first, so I won’t do anything.”
“I’m glad to hear that,” I agreed.
“Andrew also said he didn’t know that’s what happened, so he didn’t realize what Little Ricky had said to him when he was knocked out,” Sammy continued. “But even after I explained it to him, it’s still the way he feels.”
“You’re brother is very wise, for a little man,” I confirmed, which drew a bashful grin from Andrew. I had intentionally called him a little man, because I didn’t want him continuing to think of himself as a baby, and maybe it was finally starting to sink in. Now that we had Jesse, who was younger, and Andrew had taken on a mentoring role with him, I believe he was no longer considering himself to be a baby. God DOES seem to work in strange and mysterious ways.
Once the others left and Andrew, Jesse and I were alone, I let the two boys spend most of the evening on their own. I stayed out of the spotlight and allowed them the time they both needed to be with each other. It was obviously much more important, and more cathartic, than spending the time with me.
As it began to grow late, I had Jesse slip on one of the pairs of pajamas I had brought down for Andrew. Even though the boys generally sleep nude or in their underwear at home, we keep pajamas on hand, to take with us when we’re away from home. Once they were both ready for bed, I tucked my boys in together and kissed each of them on the forehead. As I observed them getting comfortable, it was almost as if I were watching a broken toy mend itself and come together as a perfect whole again. I could also tell it was something both of them had sorely missed.
It didn’t take long before they fell asleep, snuggled against each another. Seeing how they were so tightly curled against one another reminded me of a litter of puppies or kittens. It was just so damn cute to see the way they had bonded and I was fairly certain this connection would never end. After I was convinced they were going to be fine, I left and went home too. There were things I needed to get done before morning, but I was also looking forward to sleeping in a bed again.
Although I was still a little worried about Andrew, he was doing much better and in the very capable hands of the medical staff at the hospital. Therefore, I thought he would do fine without me and felt I could leave him temporarily. Besides, he also had Jesse to keep him company.
On the other hand, I haven’t been able to spend much time with Jake in a while, and I also wanted to make sure both Sammy and Little Ricky had completely gotten past what was bothering them. When I arrived home, everything seemed to be going smoothly, at least for our household. The other boys did have a lot of questions about Andrew; even though I’m sure they asked many of the same things of the others, after they returned from their visit.
After I answered all their queries, I took Sammy and Little Ricky aside, one at a time. I just needed to ask them a few more questions, before I let this drop. After doing it, I was convinced Sammy had forgiven Little Ricky and put his other problems behind him too, since his tormentors were now in jail. Little Ricky was also doing better. He didn’t appear to feel quite as guilty about what he had done, because it appeared that Andrew was going to be fine and had forgiven him. Little Ricky did promise, once again, that he’d never pull another prank on anyone, for as long as he lived. This made me feel better too and it was nice to see things returning to normal.
Since that had been taken care of, Jake and I went off to watch a movie in the family room. Even though we weren’t alone, we only paid attention to each other and the movie, for a change. When the show ended, we went to bed, so we could have a little more time together. It didn’t take Jake long to begin to feel frisky and soon I had a wild animal on my hands. He was as eager to satisfy me, as I was to satisfy him, and once our romantic session ended, we turned in.
I still had to get up early in the morning, because I wanted to be at the hospital by 7:00. This wasn’t just so I could check on both boys, but I also wanted to catch the doctor when he made his first rounds. Seeing I didn’t know what time he would be doing that, I wanted to makes sure I was at the hospital before he was.
When the alarm went off, I felt better than I had in a few days. It seemed as if most of our problems were now behind us, so I began to think ahead, to our vacation. I concluded we all needed a break about now, so this vacation was coming at the right time. I just hoped everything went off as planned, because I intended for us to do a great deal, as I usually do. We would have Barry joining us too, so I felt it should prove to be interesting, besides fun and relaxing. As I considered this, I also remembered something else I needed to take care of.
By the time I got to the hospital, Andrew and Jesse were both awake and the staff had just brought their breakfast. I was expecting to have to take Jesse down to the cafeteria to eat, but someone had thought ahead and ordered something for him too, so both boys were digging in to their cereal, scrambled eggs, toast, juice and milk. They both flashed me a huge grin as I walked in the door, so I knew they’d had a good night.
After I spent a little time with them, I also made sure Andrew was feeling okay and Jesse was doing all right as well. Then, I went out to the nurses’ station and asked if they knew what time the doctor would be by or if he had left word about discharging Andrew. One of the nurses told me the doctor should be arriving within the hour, but nothing was noted on Andrew’s chart concerning discharging him. I thanked her for the information and then went back to Andrew’s room. Both boys were just lounging on the bed, still in their pj’s. It looked as if Jesse wasn’t planning to get dressed unless Andrew could go home, so I didn’t push the issue, since I didn’t see any harm in them both staying this way.
When the doctor arrived, he checked Andrew over carefully, but did so under Jesse’s watchful gaze. The doctor didn’t seem to mind this scrutiny. In fact, he explained everything he was doing to his young ‘assistant’ and Jesse would nod his understanding or force out a word or two in response. When the doctor finished, he turned toward me.
“It appears he’s doing well and will be fine,” he informed me. “I’ll go and fill out his discharge papers now. Andrew, you may get dressed, and you too, Jesse,” he added, “and an orderly will arrive with a wheelchair to take you down to your dad’s car.” Both boys were glowing. Andrew was finally going to get out of this place and return home.
Now that the doctor had finished, I asked to speak with him alone, out in the hallway, and he consented. Once we were out of range of prying little ears, I asked the questions that were weighing on my mind.
“Doctor, I need to know a few things before we leave.” The physician nodded his understanding. “First of all, I realize the boys will eventually want to go out riding again, so I need to know if Andrew will be able to do that. If so, how long should I wait before I let them go?” The neurologist took a few seconds to think about this before responding.
“Yes, he may go riding again, as long as he wears his helmet,” he advised me, “but he’ll have to wait until that leg heals, so let’s leave that up to his orthopedist.” I nodded slightly, but it led to my second question.
“That brings me to something else,” I told the physician. “I’ve been planning our vacation for several months now and we’re scheduled to leave in a few days. Should I cancel the trip, or will it be all right for Andrew to go too?”
The doctor then asked me specific questions about what our plans were, exactly what we’d be doing and then made several observations about what we should or shouldn’t include. He also suggested some options, where he thought there might be some problems.
“If you follow those guidelines,” he added, “I don’t see a problem with him participating.”
This made me feel good and I breathed a sigh of relief. I thanked the doctor before he left and then reentered Andrew’s room. I was thoroughly overjoyed. Not only did Andrew have very few restrictions, but I also wouldn’t be forced to cancel our trip. If I’d had to do that, it would have affected several other impressionable young men as well and that might have caused even greater problems. Besides protecting Andrew and making sure he recovered, I certainly didn’t want to disappoint the other boys either. It would have been a tough call, had I been forced to make it.
We actually waited about thirty minutes before the orderly showed up to take Andrew down to the main entrance, but it only took a few more minutes before we were on our way home. I noticed that Andrew was getting Jesse to talk more and more, although you could tell it took an enormous amount of effort on Jesse’s part to do so. However, Andrew encouraged his efforts and then praised him afterward. This seemed to be all Jesse needed to give it his best effort. It seemed he was willing to do almost anything to make Andrew happy, so if it meant he had to talk, he would do just that.
As we pulled into the driveway, I was surprised to see the bike Andrew had been riding out in front of the house, all fixed and polished, with Jesse’s lined up beside it. Little Ricky was the first one out of the house, with Sammy and the others following closely on his heels. He raced to the Yukon to greet us and opened the door for Andrew and Jesse. He helped Andrew get down from his lofty seat in the SUV and did everything he could to make sure Andrew didn’t fall and injure himself further while using the crutches. Andrew seemed to be enjoying this special attention, and when they approached the bikes, Little Ricky made an announcement.
“I hope you know I’m really sorry about that dumb trick I tried to pull on you,” he explained, while oozing out every ounce of sincerity he could muster. “I fixed the bike and cleaned it up, so it’s better than it was before. I don’t imagine you’ll be able to go riding again very soon, but it’s all ready to go when you are.”
Andrew understood this was meant as an additional apology, but he wasn’t going to make Little Ricky grovel forever.
“Hey, it’s okay,” he told him. “You didn’t mean for me to get hurt and I don’t blame you for trying to get even. Heck, I did things to you first.”
That seemed to be enough to remove the final feelings of guilt that had still been nagging at Little Ricky. I looked over at Sammy and gave him a wink, once I got his attention, because I wanted him to realize that’s exactly what I told him about Andrew. He didn’t want revenge, so what I told Sammy had been accurate. He just nodded his head, to let me know he understood that now.
“Thanks. I’m glad you feel that way,” Little Ricky told him, while I was communicating silently with Sammy. “I really feel bad about the way it turned out. I never thought anything would happen to you, other than you’d just get stuck somewhere and maybe have to walk home.”
“I know, so let’s just forget it. Okay?” Andrew countered, since he was ready to put this behind them.
“Okay, I can do that,” Little Ricky agreed. He was also glad it was finally over.
The boys went into the house and quickly disappeared. I knew the three of them were spending time together, as Little Ricky was still trying to make up for his blunder, even though Andrew had let him off of the hook. I guess it was just his nature, but now we could all move on with our lives again.