Just arriving at the cafeteria to have lunch with my boyfriend, I enter and see him sitting with Jeremy Collins. That fucker's been trying to steal Ricky away from me forever. I stand there in the entrance, seeing them talking to one another, laughing. It makes my blood boil!
Ricky and I have been together for almost a year. He said he loved me and after all that time he's sitting there having a good time with another boy, just because I'm late?
Hurt turns to anger. I feel like I want to pull that little bitch's hair out, rip off his head and piss down his neck! Then the little scamp goes over and kisses my boy on the cheek, smiles and walks away. I couldn't take it; I run.
I run to one of the out-of-the-way bathrooms, sequester myself in a stall and cry. I cry for the loss of the boy I loved, the boy I thought would be with me forever. All I wanted to do at that moment was to die, the pain was that bad.
I wonder what's keeping him. Tom is never late for lunch. It's one of the few times in the day at school we can spend time together since our class schedules are totally different. Tom and I have been together a year now… almost. He is my sun, my moon, and my stars; in short, he's my universe.
As I sit there, Jeremy Collins stops by the table and I invite him to sit and talk while I wait for Tom. Jeremy is cute, I'll give you that, but his beauty pales in comparison to Tom Johnson.
Our conversation is light; that is, until Jeremy makes his intentions known.
"I really wish we had gotten together, Ricky. I think you're a dream and I don't think Tom appreciates you. Why don't we go out one night, he needn't know."
I smile. Even though I'd never in a million years cheat on the boy I love, it still feels good to think he feels that way about me. That's only normal. But it would never happen.
"Jeremy, I'm flattered that you feel that way, but I am totally committed to Tom. When we graduate in a couple of months, I'm going to ask him to get married. I am sure you will find the right boy for you."
Jeremy, defeated, stands, walks over to me and kisses my cheek. "I'm sorry, Ricky. You can't blame a boy for trying." Then he walks away.
I'm starting to worry now; Tom is never this late even when his bitch of a science teacher keeps him after she releases the class because of whatever bullshit reason she decides to keep him.
Looking at my watch, I realize that more than half of our lunch hour is gone. She's never kept him this late. I need to go look for him. What if something has happened to him? Walking the halls, I don't see him. I arrive at his last class and find the door closed. Through the glass I could see the lights were off. Where could he be?
Aimlessly I search, but to no avail, until I hear something. Coming from one of the rarely used bathrooms, I hear crying. Now I realize Tom had seen Jeremy and me talking.
I rush into the bathroom and find him huddled in the last stall. His eyes are red-rimmed and tears stain his beautiful face. He sees me and hisses, "Why don't you go be with your new boyfriend, Jeremy Collins!"
I'm taken aback by this. Does he really think I'd leave him for someone like Jeremy? Then I realize it wasn't him talking, it was jealousy. Despite his struggles, I hold him in my arms; I kiss him. With my thumbs I wipe away his tears.
After a time, we hear the bell ring, signaling the end of lunch. He starts to get up and I hold him. "Babe, fuck class, you are more important. I want you to listen to me."
The look in his eye almost breaks my heart. He is in pain; pain caused by my inaction. I could have told Jeremy to leave, that I was expecting Tom, but I had no idea Tom would be jealous.
"Jeremy stopped by the table, and I won't lie, he asked me out. Do you have any idea what I told him?" He shakes his head; the look in his eye is one of longing. "I told him I was going to ask you to marry me." His eyes open wide, yet he says nothing.
Still holding him, I drop to one knee. "Thomas Johnson, would you make me the happiest boy on the planet and agree to be my husband? Nobody has ever made me feel the love that I was giving was being returned, until I met you." He smiles… finally. He wraps his arms around me and we kiss. I don't know how long we have been here, but it doesn’t matter.
"So you guys got married, Grandpa?"
Sitting there with the children of one of our adopted sons, my memories of my love drifting over me, I feel at peace. Tom and I were married. We went to college and started our careers. When we were both in our late 20s we decided to adopt.
It wasn't easy, but we were able to eventually adopt a three-year-old boy named James. James grew up with the stigma of having two dads but he used that to grow into a very strong person. Not that he had muscles on his muscles, but his sense of who he was, what kind of man he became, was solid.
After he finished college, he told us he'd proposed to a young woman named Stephanie. The proudest day in our lives was the day Stephanie gave birth to the triplets. Lenny, Jim, and Eric were the cutest boys. They were all boy too. As they grew to their age now of eleven, they became curious as to why they’d had two granddads instead of a granddad and gramma.
Here they sit mesmerized by my story; I only wish my beloved was still alive to help me with the retelling. Losing him to Cancer at the age of 53; it is only fitting to tell them this story at Tom's wake.
I look up and with a tear running down my face, I softly say, "Tom, I know you can hear me, I still love you."