Brendan walked into the kitchen a week later and plopped down at the breakfast bar, giving me a serious look. "What crawled in your Corn Flakes and died?" I asked him with a laugh.
"Geez, even your jokes are about dead stuff, now," he complained. Before I could reply, he continued. "I get the bad humor. You always told Dad jokes, so that one we kind of can't avoid." At this point he stood up and walked up to me and put his hands on each side of my face, looking me straight in the eye. "Bro, I say this with all the love I can give to you and Scooter. Pitch the stinking carnations to the compost heap, dude."
"What?" I questioned as I pulled away from him and walked into the laundry room as the dryer buzzed to let me know the babies' clothes were dry. Brendan followed me and then gasped and started pointing at the shelf above the washer and dryer.
"You even have one in here?" he demanded. "Seriously, I know you got it bad, bro, but come on, cut the rest of us a little slack."
"What are you talking about, Bren?"
"Cam, you have a carnation in a bud vase in every room of the house but our bedrooms upstairs. You even have one in our bathroom and our computer room."
"They are such pretty flowers and they smell so nice," I protested.
"They look like a wad of crepe paper and they do NOT smell nice," he returned. "They may smell like Scooter to you, but the rest of the family thinks they smell like his job, which is seriously creepy, ok?"
"I thought you guys liked Scooter," I reminded him as I stood there folding the bin full of onesies, tossing out the ones that were too stained to use again.
"He's a great guy and we all love him to pieces, especially since he brought back your smile," he admitted, for which I grabbed him and hugged him. "But that job of his is like nightmare city."
"Ok, I will give you that one," I had to agree. "Don't you dare tell him I said that, though. Funeral homes are never going to be anyone's favorite place to be, unless you are like him and you really enjoy helping people with that terrible time in their lives."
"No arguments, Scooter is really good at what he does," Brendan confessed. "I just don't want to know about it." He grabbed a piece of the unfolded laundry and started helping. "Now about all these carnations."
"Hey at least it is just one in a bud vase, not a whole arrangement," I pointed out.
"I never said the situation couldn't be worse, I just let you know that it is bad enough now."
"Ok, I'll keep the carnations in my room from now on," I conceded. "Are you happy now?"
"Yes, thank you," he replied sarcastically. "I will even volunteer to gather them all up and put them all in a large vase right beside your bed, so you don't have to throw them out until they have fallen apart."
"Thanks, bro," I hugged him again. "But not beside the bed; I might knock them over reaching for the alarm clock or the phone. Put them on the little table beside my chair in front of the window where I read."
"Consider it done, lovebird brother of mine," he teased as he walked out taking the carnation from the laundry room with him.
"You might want to leave the one in your bathroom, though," I called after him. "It smells better in there with it than it did without."
He popped his head back into the laundry room and said, "That was just uncalled for and uncouth."
"Uncouth?" I questioned. "You really are learning from school, aren't you?"
"You're so mean sometimes," he pouted. "You… you… big brother you."
"Go take care of the flowers, you goof," I said shooing him out of the kitchen as I came through with the basket of folded baby clothes. "Tell the other boys that dinner will be ready in an hour."
"You know we have three extras in the house right?" he asked me. "Jack, Zack, and Trey came home with Pete and Rimmer today. They are studying together for their final tests next week."
"Nice of them to let me know," I laughed. "Ok, adding water to the soup."
"You don't really do that, do you?"
"Do what?" I asked in return.
"You don't really just add water to the soup when extra kids show up, do you?" he pushed.
"Of course not, you twerp," I scoffed. "That's just an old saying. I will add more veggies though."
"You are an evil man," he told me, and then poked out his tongue and walked away gathering flowers as he went.
"Dude, did somebody in your family die?" I heard one of the young visitors upstairs ask as I walked past the bottom of the stairs. "There's like dead people flowers everywhere in your house."
"Brendan, has already talked to me, boys," I called out. "The flowers are being moved to my room."
"Ephraim made me say that," the same voice yelled back. "Oww!"
"No hitting guests even if they did rat on you," I scolded even as I laughed to myself.
"Sorry Dad," Ephraim apologized loudly.
"What are you telling him sorry for? I'm the one you clobbered," the other voice I could now recognize as Jack said. "Gay boys are so abusive to straight guys. You make out in front of me when we are supposed to be studying, and now you hit me."
"Extra cookies for Jack," I announced loudly as I opened the door to the wing of the house I shared with the babies. I heard thundering feet on the stairs, and added with a yell, "After dinner."
"Aww, man, even the grown up gay guys pick on me."
I was still laughing when I came back out of my room and headed back to the kitchen.
Although Scooter was a frequent face around the house, he still hadn't spent the night since he and I realized that we were both interested in each other. Neither of us wanted to push the other, or the boys, too far too fast. We thought we were being subtle about our feelings toward each other, but little straight boy Jack clued us in at dinner that night.
"Mr. Scumachi when I kill my brother next week, will you paint his toenails purple for his funeral?"
"Of course, we try to do everything a family asks for their loved one," Scooter replied while sneaking looks at me.
"Mr. Ragland, do you think you could write your cookie recipe in green crayon on a piece of pink construction paper and mail it to yourself," Jack asked me.
"I will do it tonight after dinner," I answered vacantly, while sneaking looks at Scooter.
The rest of the boys were snickering at this point. "Did you guys see on the news today that a purple elephant with orange spots escaped from the zoo over on White Street?" Jack continued his nonsense. "It snuck into the space shuttle that had just landed at the high school football stadium, and then a trained cat flew them both to Jupiter just in time for the annual convention of the wizards and witches. Harry Potter was there along with Dumbledore, Gandalf, and Mickey Mouse."
"A trained cat?" I questioned. The boys all burst into hysterical laughter finally. "Ok, what did I miss?"
"Guys, do you realize that you stare at each other more over dinner than all the rest of these guys put together?" Jack asked directly, now that he had our attention. "Have you two been on a date since that night you went to see the show with Mr… err… Miss…. Ummm Piper?"
"We have been busy," Scooter defended.
"We don't want my boys to think we are rushing anything," I explained.
"Rushing?" Ephraim squeaked. "If you were going any slower, you would be going backwards."
"Yeah, Dad," Derek added. "Why don't you two go see a movie or something? We'll be fine here. Bren and I can babysit all the munchkins."
"Munchkins?" Peter sputtered.
"Babysit who?" Ephraim growled.
"Don't antagonize your little brother, Derek," I scolded with a smile.
"Don't evade the question, Cam," Brendan quipped. He then turned to Scooter. "You want to know how bad my big tough ninja brother has it for you? He kept carnations all over the house just so he could smell you in the house."
"Aww, that's so romantic," Zack cooed, as Jack said, "Eeww that's gross."
"I haven't seen any flowers in the house," Scooter observed.
"Dude, they were choking me with that smell," Brendan griped. "I made him put them all in his bedroom."
"Maybe you should take him in there and show him your flowers," Jack suggested wiggling his eyebrows.
"Dude, seriously," Derek told him. "If you can't come up with better pickup lines than that, you are never going to get a date."
"I don't know," Scooter said shyly. "I think I would like to see the flowers."
"T.M.I. dead dude," Brendan complained. "You guys want to get kinky over smelly flowers, don't do it in front of the children. Impressionable young minds might think such sappiness is acceptable in public."
"You really want to see the flowers?" I asked Scooter, ignoring the boys once again.
"I have wanted to see your flowers for almost 20 years now," Scooter answered.
"Dang, dude," Jack blurted. "I thought you wanted to do the nasty. Even I know not to bring up age when you want something from a grownup."
"Do the nasty?" Zack repeated. "I swear sometimes I can't believe we are related."
"Bren, you and Derek, are in charge for the rest of the night," I informed the boys as I stood up. "Ephraim is in charge in the kitchen, though. Make sure everything gets washed and put away. It shouldn't take you long with this many helpers."
Scooter took my hand when I held it out to him and we walked out of the dining room and into the new wing of the house. That was the first night he spent in my bed that we were both under the covers… at least some of the time we were, anyway. At some point, Ray came by and picked up Jack, Zack, and Trey and took them home. The older boys were on their own for breakfast the next morning, but Scooter and I did come out of my room just in time to have Ephraim ask if Scooter wanted him to ask the twins and Trey to come over and help him move in.
"Move in?" Scooter mumbled sleepily.
"Well, yeah," Ephraim said a little impatiently. "You are going to move in with Dad now aren't you? You don't want my little brothers to be illiterate."
"You mean illegitimate," Derek corrected.
"Oh no he'd better not mean that," I scolded. "There is nothing illiterate… I mean illegit… I'm not saying that word again, and none of you will either. Scooter is not moving in."
"I'm not?" he asked a little hurt.
"You want to?" I blurted in surprise.
"I… well… if you aren't ready…" he said sadly.
"Ephraim, tell the boys to be ready for moving furniture this weekend," I announced as I grabbed Scooter and hugged him tight. Bren, Derek, and Ephraim turned it into a group hug quickly enough.
"Welcome home, Uncle Scooter," Ephraim announced. "I hope it's ok that I don't call you Pops, but Andy and Caine can if they want to. I won't mind that."
"Nobody is ever going to replace your Pops, little man," Scooter told him. "Uncle Scooter is just fine from you and your friends. Derek and Brendan can just call me Scooter."
Scooter had been renting a furnished apartment, so he didn't have a lot of stuff to move. In fact by the time the boys all showed up that weekend for the moving party, it only took one trip to finish what he hadn't already brought over during the week. We then had a big Welcome Home party, and Scooter got to show off his grilling skills by doing burgers and hot dogs for everyone. Life settled down fairly quickly after that, but there were still occasional adjustments to be made for all of us.
The boys learned pretty quickly that greeting Scooter the moment he got home was not always a good idea. Before he had moved in, Scooter had always gone home and showered and changed clothes before coming out to the farm. Apparently, when you work in a mortuary, there are much worse smells to deal with than the carnations the boys still teased Scooter and I about. Even the little ones occasionally scrunched their noses when he would pick them up as he came through the house in the evening.
"Cam! You need to speak to your babies. I can't believe that they make faces over how I smell after work when they stink so badly after eating," Scooter complained as he stood in the kitchen holding the two babies he had just picked up out of their play pen.
"Well fortunately you all three smell better after a good bath, so I am thinking of adding a shower to the laundry room, so you can clean up as soon as you get home."
"CAM! You would think I worked in a sewer the way you are talking," Scooter pouted.
"I know you don't work in a sewer. It smells fresher," I teased him. "Besides, you dress too well to work in the sewer," I added with a kiss to the cheek. "You make me feel like a bum when I am wearing jeans and a t shirt and you are in Men In Black suits all the time."
"Hot Stuff, you always look good, no matter what you wear," Scooter flirted as he put the babies back down and hugged Cam tight.
"Flattery will get you everywhere, my friend," I joked.
"DAD! Stop flirting with Uncle Scooter so he can go clean up," a voice called from upstairs. "I want a snack, but if I come downstairs and smell dead people, I'm gonna lose my appetite, and probably my lunch."
"Derek, be nice to dead people dude," Brendan told him. "He keeps Cam happy, and when Cam is happy he bakes cookies."
"Yeah, Derek shut up before we lose out on today's cookies fix," Ephraim added.
"I feel so appreciated around here," Scooter sniffled melodramatically. He then sniffed a few more times. "Ok, so maybe you all have a point. I am a little pungent today. We got a guy in today…."
"NO DETAILS!" Ephraim, Brendan, Derek and I all yelled at once.
"You know some people support their loved ones in their careers," Scooter retorted.
"We do support your career," I replied. "We keep things so crazy around here that you have to appreciate working with the nice quiet dead people all day."
"True that," Scooter agreed as he headed for the door to the master suite, yanking his tie off as he went.
I spritzed the air with a little bit of orange zest air freshener, and then yelled up the stairs for the boys. "Dead people dude is in the shower and I have orange zested the air. Cookies should be cool in ten minutes." I was answered by a thundering herd of animals descending the stairs in full feeding frenzy mode.
"If they are cooling, that means they are already out of the oven," Derek said with a big grin.
"And if they are out of the oven, they are cool enough," Brendan finished as he grabbed for a cookie on the tray, then yelped and jerked his hand back.
"You were saying," Ephraim laughed as he grabbed the bottle of aloe gel from the counter by the sink and handed it to Brendan.
I couldn't help smiling at how much Brendan looked like Caine as he sat on a stool sucking his fingers. "I did say ten minutes," I pointed out. "Derek, give your man some first aid, and then the two of you go put the babies down for their nap while Ephraim and I move the cookies to the cooling rack. By the time you get back the cookies should be cool enough to touch without crying."
"Hey!" Brendan protested. "I did not cry."
"No you just sucked your finger like Caine and Andy," Ephraim giggled.
"Well it hurt," Brendan pouted.
A few moments later, Derek and Brendan came back to the kitchen, both very red in the face and uncharacteristically quiet.
"Ok, spill it," I ordered. "What got into you two?"
"Nothing that big ever," Derek blurted then turned even redder.
"What are you talking about?" I asked him.
"Let's just say that we now have a much, much larger understanding of why you have been smiling so much since Scooter moved in," Brendan told me.
"Larger? Try HUGE," Derek corrected.
Just then Scooter walked into the kitchen wearing his bathrobe and lounge pants. "Guys, I am so sorry. I had no idea you would be checking on the babies when I came out of the bathroom. I promise to always take my robe with me into the bathroom from now on."
"I think that will be the end of this conversation," I urged pointedly, as I nodded toward Ephraim, who thankfully had been busy and not heard what was being said. Even better, it really was the end of the conversation as someone knocked on the French doors of the dining room as they opened them and came in. We went out and saw Daniel, Brooke, Peter, and Karen entering the room. Such close family didn't really need to knock and they knew that, which is why they let themselves in.
"I hope it's ok, Dad, but I have invited Janice and Kathryn over," Daniel told me as he came over and gave me a hug. I was still amazed each time he did that, and it clued me in that something was going on even more than the family gathering.
"I told Grandma and Gramps to come too," Brooke told me as she walked up and kissed my cheek and hugged me as well.
"Ok, I know it's not my birthday," I laughed a little nervously.
"They've got something to tell us all, they said," Karen announced. "They wouldn't give me a clue, either. They just said they wanted the family together for a meeting."
A couple of minutes later, Mom and Reynold knocked at the front door. Scooter let them in as he rejoined the group sitting around the dining room table after he had gotten dressed. We didn't have to wait too much longer before Janice barged into the house.
"Ok, what was so important that I had to give up the one night Kathryn isn't on call at the hospital?" she demanded as she stared at us all.
Daniel stood up and cleared his throat nervously. "We wanted to let you all know at the same time so nobody would get upset that someone else heard first," he started.
"Is there some problem with the construction company, Daniel?" Reynold asked softly.
"No, nothing is wrong at all," Brooke corrected. "In fact, just the opposite. Nothing has ever been so right."
"We are… I mean Brooke is… well, I guess we both are since we did it together, obviously," Daniel stammered.
"What Daniel is trying to tell you is that we are going to have a baby," Brooke announced.
The room broke into pandemonium for a bit as everyone was hugging and congratulating and wiping tears of joy. Daniel finally cleared his throat again getting everyone's attention. He was back to staring at his feet as he tried to speak though.
"Dad, Janice, we have something very important we would like to ask the two of you," he finally got out. "We have discussed names for the baby already and we both would really like it if you two agree that is."
"What do we have to agree to, Daniel?" Janice asked him.
"We would like to name the baby Edan if he's a boy, and Beth if she's a girl," Brooke told us.
"Of course, if you don't want us to do that," Daniel began, but never got to finish as Janice and I both pounced the two of them hugging them and crying.
"I think it would be wonderful if you named your baby Edan," I told them hoarsely as my emotions were choking me.
"Beth would be very honored as well," Janice added.
"I'm so glad you are all happy about this, especially Karen and Dad," Daniel smiled. "We were the most worried about you two."
"Why on earth would you be afraid to tell me anything?" Karen asked.
"Well, we are both still really young, and you guys are too really," Brooke explained. "We were afraid you wouldn't take the news that you are going to be grandparents all that well."
Karen and I both slumped into chairs. "Grandparents," she and I mumbled in stereo shock. The rest of the room broke into laughs at the two of us of course.
"Speaking of announcements," Peter said loudly. "Mom, do you have anything you want to share with the family?"
"I don't know what you are talking about," she mumbled quietly.
"Mom, I heard you and Ray talking about it the other night," he prodded.
"You should not eavesdrop on…. Oh, alright, but he should be here too, you know," she surrendered.
"I already know, sweetheart," Reynold told her. "Ray asked me about it, before he asked you. I also know he is planning to tell his boys tonight, so you might as well spill the beans for the rest of the clan."
"He didn't tell me he was going to talk to them," Karen blurted nervously. "What if they say no?"
"Mom, I talked with Trey on the phone the night you and Ray talked it over in our house," Peter informed her. "They are not going to say no. He and I both think it's great." He turned to his sister then and said, "You aren't the only one adding to the family. Ray has asked Mom to marry him. She wouldn't say yes until he talked to his kids and she talked to us, though."
"Mother!" Brooke blurted. "How could you keep that nice man waiting like that? You have to know that we all want you to be happy again."
"True that," I confirmed for the rest of the family. "Karen, you are just as much a sister to me now as Janice is, and I can't tell you how happy I am that you and Ray have found your hearts again."
"Call Ray and get him and his boys over here, somebody," Scooter ordered. "Derek, let's me and you fire up the grill. Tonight calls for a party."
"Cooks to the kitchen," I called out. "While Derek and Scooter work the grill, we can fix the rest of the food."
"Umm… is Derek safe to be around food preparation?" Janice asked me quietly.
"My son just needed to find his niche," I told her proudly. "He is a walking disaster in the kitchen, but he seems to have a flair for the grill, just like Scooter."
An hour or two later, I was looking around the house at this enormous and steadily growing family of mine. Home is really a wonderful place, and life does go on. Sure I was missing some people that I really wanted to be there with me, but I also had some new family members that I already couldn't imagine life without them. I also knew better than most that the ones that weren't with us physically were never that far away from us either.